This book is a work of fiction and the subject matter it presents, Feng Shui, hereafter called the material, is simply not true and is provided solely for entertainment purposes. The author and publisher accept no responsibility for the consequences caused, directly or indirectly, by actually implementing or attempting to implement the suggestions provided by the material. This includes, but is not limited to, the professional and social anxieties caused by: 1) being called a 'candy-assed, pussy-whipped new-age weirdo' in front of peers or senior management, 2) social ostracism, 3) inability to get a good table at a popular restaurant.
Officially sanctioned uses of the material are limited to the solicitation or embarrassment of members of the opposite sex, hereafter called bimbos, through a feigned belief in exaggerated importance of the material. Complete legal protection is only afforded when bimbos are provided with a copy of this disclaimer and sign a legally sanctioned waiver in the presence of a witness. EVEN WHEN THE MATERIAL USED CORRECTLY AND IN ACCORDANCE WITH THIS DISCLAIMER, ABSOLUTELY NO GUARANTEE IS PROVIDED THAT THE MATERIAL WILL 'TRANSFORM YOUR LIFE' OR IMPROVE CHANCES FOR TEMPORARY MEANINGFUL RELATIONSHIPS.
Except in conjunction with the uses previously described, the material should not be used as an aide in interior decorating, apartment or partner selection or especially investment decisions. Do not use the material in conjunction with alcohol or other controlled substances, which can cause naive belief and can lead to purchases of inappropriate furnishings, crystals or other new-age paraphernalia. Extreme cases cause membership or even leadership roles in religious cults. Reader discretion is advised. The material should not be given to minors.
This disclaimer has been provided as mandated by the Delta-lan committee rules for truth in publishing. Note that this disclaimer has no legal force in Northern California and certain sections of Greenwich Village.
All rights reserved.